Monday, August 10, 2009

UPS Next Day Air: You're Welcome.

I just lined up everything I needed for today's errands (a check for the bank; the shopping list and tote bags for a Trader Joe's run; a couple items and their receipt to make a return at AC Moore; money and empty egg cartons for the family from whom we buy fresh eggs), and...

...after a (mercifully brief) search, realized that I'd left my keys in my brother's car, which... now in New Jersey, where he returned last night after a weekend visit up here.

That's a wee bit out of range of the beeping key finder device I had a while back, which, though it did help locate my keys if they were on my desk or in a coat pocket instead of on their hook, turned into something of an embarrassment when it wouldn't stop beeping, unprompted, no matter which battery got replaced or how often.

So I had to call my egg-selling friend back and say I wouldn't be coming after all, because I had no keys. She must think I'm losing my mind. The last time I bought eggs, I was $3 short because I'd left my wallet at home and didn't realize it until I was in her doorway. She was very cheerful about that, and very cheerful about this. I think it must be something of a relief to see there's someone who has her shit less together than you. I guess I don't mind being that person once in a while.

However, a firm Note To Self: Don't take critical items out of their usual places. Just don't. Even if it means bringing the whole handbag when all you need with you is a single key -- bring it. Also: saying out loud, "I AM PUTTING MY KEYS HERE," is not a reliable safeguard against forgetting to pick them back up, though it will help you remember where you left them, once it's too late.



  1. Oh Thank Gawd...

    Its Not just me who's scatty then ?

    Well, thats a relief


  2. Years ago, in a very tough neighborhood, I locked myself out of the car. The walk out of the neighborhood was frightening to say the least, notwithstanding that back in the day I was a very formidable presence. First thing I did after making the retrieval was to go and have a complete set of keys made, I now carry two sets. I also put up a key rack in the kitchen that has spares to everything, those keys never leave the rack. You will thank me later.

  3. Ay! You know what I have taken to doing, since I can't rely on my OWN brain to remember anything any more? Telling my kids to remember things for me. As in, "Tomorrow? When I ask you where I put my keys? Answer that they are on this shelf."

    Of course, it's not exactly a fail safe system.... and it does nothing to refute their perception of my feeble mental state, but let's get to the real point here: they have Trader Joe's on the Cape?

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  5. [Previous comment deleted b/c I don't make sense before tea.]

    YES! Trader Joe's came to Hyannis a few years back. They're right on Route 132, in the (godforsaken) Christmas Tree Shop plaza.

    It was one of the best things ever to happen to our fair peninsula. I rank it right up there with the designation of the National Seashore.